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第224章 PART THREE(6)

Alcesimarchus,Phoedromus,Diabolus,and Argyrippus,descend from Courtille in Labatut's posting-chaise;Aulus Gellius would halt no longer in front of Congrio than would Charles Nodier in front of Punchinello;Marto is not a tigress,but Pardalisca was not a dragon;Pantolabus the wag jeers in the Cafe Anglais at Nomentanus the fast liver,Hermogenus is a tenor in the Champs-Elysees,and round him,Thracius the beggar,clad like Bobeche,takes up a collection;the bore who stops you by the button of your coat in the Tuileries makes you repeat after a lapse of two thousand years Thesprion's apostrophe:

Quis properantem me prehendit pallio?The wine on Surene is a parody of the wine of Alba,the red border of Desaugiers forms a balance to the great cutting of Balatro,Pere Lachaise exhales beneath nocturnal rains same gleams as the Esquiliae,and the grave of the poor bought for five years,is certainly the equivalent of the slave's hived coffin.

Seek something that Paris has not.

The vat of Trophonius contains nothing that is not in Mesmer's tub;Ergaphilas lives again in Cagliostro;the Brahmin Vasaphanta become incarnate in the Comte de Saint-Germain;the cemetery of Saint-Medard works quite as good miracles as the Mosque of Oumoumie at Damascus.

Paris has an AEsop-Mayeux,and a Canidia,Mademoiselle Lenormand.It is terrified,like Delphos at the fulgurating realities of the vision;it makes tables turn as Dodona did tripods.

It places the grisette on the throne,as Rome placed the courtesan there;and,taking it altogether,if Louis XV.

is worse than Claudian,Madame Dubarry is better than Messalina.

Paris combines in an unprecedented type,which has existed and which we have elbowed,Grecian nudity,the Hebraic ulcer,and the Gascon pun.It mingles Diogenes,Job,and Jack-pudding,dresses up a spectre in old numbers of the Constitutional,and makes Chodruc Duclos.

Although Plutarch says:

the tyrant never grows old,Rome,under Sylla as under Domitian,resigned itself and willingly put water in its wine.

The Tiber was a Lethe,if the rather doctrinary eulogium made of it by Varus Vibiscus is to be credited:

Contra Gracchos Tiberim habemus,Bibere Tiberim,id est seditionem oblivisci.Paris drinks a million litres of water a day,but that does not prevent it from occasionally beating the general alarm and ringing the tocsin.

With that exception,Paris is amiable.

It accepts everything royally;it is not too particular about its Venus;its Callipyge is Hottentot;provided that it is made to laugh,it condones;ugliness cheers it,deformity provokes it to laughter,vice diverts it;be eccentric and you may be an eccentric;even hypocrisy,that supreme cynicism,does not disgust it;it is so literary that it does not hold its nose before Basile,and is no more scandalized by the prayer of Tartuffe than Horace was repelled by the'hiccup'of Priapus.No trait of the universal face is lacking in the profile of Paris.The bal Mabile is not the polymnia dance of the Janiculum,but the dealer in ladies'wearing apparel there devours the lorette with her eyes,exactly as the procuress Staphyla lay in wait for the virgin Planesium.

The Barriere du Combat is not the Coliseum,but people are as ferocious there as though Caesar were looking on.The Syrian hostess has more grace than Mother Saguet,but,if Virgil haunted the Roman wine-shop,David d'Angers,Balzac and Charlet have sat at the tables of Parisian taverns.

Paris reigns.Geniuses flash forth there,the red tails prosper there.Adonai passes on his chariot with its twelve wheels of thunder and lightning;Silenus makes his entry there on his ass.

For Silenus read Ramponneau.

Paris is the synonym of Cosmos,Paris is Athens,Sybaris,Jerusalem,Pantin.

All civilizations are there in an abridged form,all barbarisms also.

Paris would greatly regret it if it had not a guillotine.

A little of the Place de Greve is a good thing.

What would all that eternal festival be without this seasoning?

Our laws are wisely provided,and thanks to them,this blade drips on this Shrove Tuesday.

BOOK FIRST.——PARIS STUDIED IN ITS ATOM

Ⅺ TO SCOFF,TO REIGN

There is no limit to Paris.

No city has had that domination which sometimes derides those whom it subjugates.

To please you,O Athenians!exclaimed Alexander.

Paris makes more than the law,it makes the fashion;Paris sets more than the fashion,it sets the routine.

Paris may be stupid,if it sees fit;it sometimes allows itself this luxury;then the universe is stupid in company with it;then Paris awakes,rubs its eyes,says:

'How stupid I am!'and bursts out laughing in the face of the human race.What a marvel is such a city!it is a strange thing that this grandioseness and this burlesque should be amicable neighbors,that all this majesty should not be thrown into disorder by all this parody,and that the same mouth can to-day blow into the trump of the Judgment Day,and to-morrow into the reed-flute!Paris has a sovereign joviality.

Its gayety is of the thunder and its farce holds a sceptre.

Its tempest sometimes proceeds from a grimace.

Its explosions,its days,its masterpieces,its prodigies,its epics,go forth to the bounds of the universe,and so also do its cock-and-bull stories.Its laugh is the mouth of a volcano which spatters the whole earth.Its jests are sparks.

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